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The JUICIEST Excerpts From “Fire and Fury” Are SHADY AF! (Ivanka Tells Daddy’s Hair Secrets!)


I’ll admit, I ordered my copy of Michael Wolff‘s Fire And Fury the first day The Guardian excerpted those jaw-dropping Steve Bannon quotes. It was released early and I have friends who not only ordered copes but also download it yesterday because they CAN’T WAIT to dive in. Well, her are some of the most salacious parts. Get some popcorn.

Ivanka told her friends about the secrets of her Dad’s mysterious hair…

She treated her father with some lightness, even irony, and in at least one television interview she made fun of his comb-over. She often described the mechanics behind it to friends: an absolutely clean pate—a contained island after scalp reduction surgery—surrounded by a furry circle of hair around the sides and front, from which all ends are drawn up to meet in the center and then swept back and secured by a stiffening spray. The color, she would point out to comical effect, was from a product called Just for Men—the longer it was left on, the darker it got. Impatience resulted in Trump’s orange-blond hair color.

Trump’s reason for eating McDonald’s is bizarre.

He had a longtime fear of being poisoned, one reason why he liked to eat at McDonald’s — nobody knew he was coming and the food was safely premade.

Trump is a “post-literate” TV junkie;

Trump has repeatedly claimed that a busy schedule and strong work ethic keeps him from watching much television. “Primarily because of documents,” he told reporters aboard Air Force One in November. “I’m reading documents. A lot. And different things. I actually read much more — I read you people much more than I watch television.”

Trump has three TVs in his White House bedroom, hardly reads and struggles to process information.

Trump didn’t read. He didn’t really even skim. If it was print, it might as well not exist. Some believed that for all practical purposes he was no more than semiliterate. (There was some argument about this, because he could read headlines and articles about himself, or at least headlines on articles about himself, and the gossip squibs on the New York Post’s Page Six.) Some thought him dyslexic; certainly his comprehension was limited. Others concluded that he didn’t read because he just didn’t have to, and that in fact this was one of his key attributes as a populist. He was postliterate—total television.

Bannon told Wolff:

“[Trump’s] a guy who really hated school … And he’s not going to start liking it now.”

Apparently, everybody in the White House was a leaker, including Trump.

The constant leaking was often blamed on lower minions and permanent executive branch staff, culminating in late February with an all-hands meeting of staffers called by Sean Spicer—cell phones surrendered at the door—during which the press secretary issued threats of random phone checks and admonitions about the use of encrypted texting apps. Everybody was a potential leaker; everybody was accusing everybody else of being a leaker.

Everybody was a leaker.

White House Press Secretary, Sean Spicer, kept repeating his daily mantra:

“You can’t make this shit up.”

Trump had no interest in healthcare or repealing Obamacare

Trump had little or no interest in the central Republican goal of repealing Obamacare. An overweight seventy-year-old man with various physical phobias (for instance, he lied about his height to keep from having a body mass index that would label him as obese), he personally found health care and medical treatments of all kinds a distasteful subject. The details of the contested legislation were, to him, particularly boring; his attention would begin wandering from the first words of a policy discussion.

During one particular health care discussion, Trump reportedly asked of his aides:

“Why can’t Medicare simply cover everybody?”

Kellyanne Conway rolled her eyes at Trump and had a convenient ON/OFF switch…

In private, in the Off position, she seemed to regard Trump as a figure of exhausting exaggeration or even absurdity—or, at least, if you regarded him that way, she seemed to suggest that she might, too. She illustrated her opinion of her boss with a whole series of facial expressions: eyes rolling, mouth agape, head snapping back. But in the On position, she metamorphosed into believer, protector, defender, and handler.

After a perceived win against Ivanka Trump over the Paris climate agreement which she was against backing out of, Bannon declared,

“Score. The bitch is dead.”

Bannon called the Trump Tower meeting with Russians “treasonous” and,

“The chance that Don Jr. did not walk these jumos up to his father’s office on the twenty-sixth floor is zero. Even if you thought that this was not treasonous, or unpatriotic, or bad shit, and I happen to think it’s all of that, you should have called the FBI immediately.”

And the best of all, Trump’s presidency might end with impeachment, according to Bannon, if Trump were to fire Robert Mueller.

“it just brings the impeachment closer.”

There’s a “33.3 percent chance that the Mueller investigation would lead to the impeachment of the president, a 33.3 percent chance that Trump would resign, perhaps in the wake of a threat by the cabinet to act on the Twenty-Fifth Amendment (by which the cabinet can remove the president in the event of his incapacitation), and a 33.3 percent chance that he would limp to the end of his term.

He’s not going to make it. He’s lost his stuff.”

I know, I’m shocked too. Not at the statement, but at the fact that I AGREE with Steve Bannon. It’s a weird feeling…

Below, someone uploaded the audiobook which might not be legal so it might disappear but there seems to be 11+ hours of it!

(Photo, YouTube; via HuffPo)

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